How To Deal With The Stress Of A Wedding
Certain events bring out certain aspects of our personality – that’s no surprise. What can be a surprise, however, is when two people get engaged and suddenly one of them becomes a complete wedding monster.
Often it’s the bride, but it can be the groom as well – I’ve even seen moms and maids-of-honor lose their minds. For simplicity’s sake, though, we’ll just use the term Bridezilla.
Why is this so common? Does wedding planning really bring out such an alien part of our psyche that we need a name for it? The thing is, a wedding is often the largest, most expensive party we’ll ever plan, and when you add into that the fact that once said party is over we’ll be married for, you know, the rest of our lives, the stress level builds up. However, over at Groom Groove, some suggestions are made for dealing with a Bridezilla.
Talk to each other. Find out before you begin what her expectations for this wedding are and figure out ways to keep these expectations realistic. And be sure to talk money. If you’re setting a budget, get involved and make sure you’re staying on track. Even though her head might spin around a few times, it’s likely that ordering light blue napkins instead of “Tiffany-blue, cream bordered and custom-monogrammed” napkins will not kill Bridezilla and it’ll save you loads of bucks.
Listen to each other. Even if you don’t want to. She might need to vent, or she might need to know you care. It’s even better if you offer to help — she might not take you up on it, but I guarantee she’ll always appreciate a sincere offer.
If necessary, give each other space. If she’s truly acting nuts, you might want to let her be for a while (after, of course, you offer to help). Let her know that you’ll keep distractions at bay so she can plan her little heart out, and then you can spend some quality time with her later.
Take each other away from the madness. It’s likely that she needs a break from being Bridezilla as much as you do, so make an effort to get her away from all the stress. Designate a night or a weekend at a spot that has NOTHING to do with the wedding, and make a point to talk about things other than wedding details.
Remember why you’re doing this. If she wasn’t a neurotic mess (or at least not a bitchy one) before the wedding, chances are very good that she’ll revert to her lovely self after the wedding. Hang in there, know that you have a well-deserved, relaxing honeymoon coming up, and always remember that you’re going to be married when all is said and done. And hopefully that still seems like a good idea.